LIFE BEYOND WORRY
Worry is a thin stream of fear, trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are poured.
Arthur Somers Rache
Do not worry about 2 days in particular, yesterday and tomorrow, for in them are hidden all our worries and fears. In yesterday, is hidden all our what ‘ifs’, poor decisions, mistakes, faults, pains and frustrations. Yet we have no magic rubber that can erase these mistakes that have been made. In tomorrow, lies our expectations, promises and hopes. So live today, make the right choices and excel in today. Nothing can bring us down when we are living today, only the fears and trepidation’s of the past and future will destroy us.
Worry is the silent disabling monster that creeps upon us, all encompassing, engulfing and suffocating. Worry is subjective. It can be defined and manifest in a multitude of ways; for example being; concerned, troubled, distresses or bothered about someone or something, feeling a sense of apprehension about a certain situation, getting overwrought. These are only a few ways in which worry can exhibit itself. However, it is quite normal to feel anxious or worried in certain situations. I am confident that we all have experienced worries in this fashion when faced with our first job interview or sitting a school exam. However, these episodes are short lived, perfectly normal and are part of our human genetic makeup. Balance and structure of thought is imperative, as lack of structure to our thought processes will increase our worry.
If we are not measured in our approach worry can become our habit. Worrying beyond reason will create immense pain, tension, frustration, stress and not to mention sleepless nights. In this way worry becomes like the swaying seesaw, swaying up and down, uncontrollably taking us from one emotional extreme to another. Naturally, excessive worry will lessen our ability to perform to our optimum levels, no matter what the task at hand maybe. A worrier will be preoccupied with negative and pessimistic thoughts, driven and directed by our fears. For a worrier, worry is a constant, repeated action, over and over again, much like a dog chewing a bone and not getting anywhere. In contrast, a little worry provides a certain edge in order to better our performance; a disproportionate amount of worry will result in the opposite. Worry in some cases will lead to high levels of anxiety that can in turn lead to panic attacks. Worry will not take us anywhere and we will simply rock forwards and backwards in torment, frustration and agony.
“Being a millionaire, steeped in poverty, yours and mine, big and small – erase this ideology from your minds.”
In life, we all have experiences that we hold onto and cherish. Equally, there are distressing, painful sentiments that we would simply like to forget. If we do not develop the ability to deal with the harrowing, distressing experiences of the past, then, the feelings of worry will manifest themselves every time when we are threatened with a similar experience. Consistently high levels of worry will attract not only high levels of cortisol impacting on our physical and emotional wellbeing but consistent worry will ensure that the mind is working in over drive without breaks and result ultimately in exhaustion. Inevitably this heightened fear of uncertainty, develops stress, anxiety and frustration, which will manifest into a physical ailment such as; a loss of appetite, sleep, increased levels of acidity, high blood pressure, diabetes, thyroid disorders etc. In most cases, our worries stem from our misplaced thoughts regarding our own abilities to handle certain situations. When in the cold light of day, there simply may be no solutions.
Remember that worrying will accomplish nothing.
A person of integrity is never busy weaving his life, to the extent that he fears being caught out at some point. His life is a simple, honest, truthful and worry free. Individuals of spiritual mindset will find that having a belief in a higher power looking after them, certainly assists in alleviating many of their life’s worries and issues. Religious thought states that life is a stream of continuous uncertainties beyond our control. Our lack of understanding of this simple powerful eternal message, shared throughout all religions, is creating an enormous amount of stress and worry for many.
“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?"
Matthew 6:25-27
When our attention is worldly wise, balanced but without religious underpinning, we will cultivate mental, emotional decay; worry and suffering is sure to follow. Religious thought will teach us that stress and worry will start to shorten our lives. In the state of worry, anxiety and stress, life becomes decrepit, devoid of joy, peace, beauty and appreciation. For most, when the solutions to our issues are found, then our worries cease until the next problem arises. Unfortunately, if there is no solution that can be found then our worry embeds itself. The religious thought is that we can only do our best. Worry originates from our ego, our false perceptions regarding our capabilities. The results of our efforts is beyond our control. Therefore, why worry? In this manner, many worries in the spiritual mind will not develop. Some Sociologists will say that religion is nothing more than a coping mechanism. However if religion can enhance living, making it more meaningful, enriched and beautiful, rather than leading a sad, grey, haggard life of worry, then so be it. Learn to listen and share your feelings with somebody you respect, this will lead to a reduction of worry.
We should remember that our emotions, are neither good nor bad, but when we attach ourselves (our ego, pride) to these emotions, we will suffer. The stronger the attachment the greater the suffering. Obviously, we are attached to our children. We invest a lot of time and effort in their upbringing, however, as parents we cannot be held responsible for their outcome.
Only when an individual attains the knowledge of the self, the sense of inadequacy will disappear from within.
Worry will remove the quality of caring, the desire to do good for others, innate qualities that we all possess. Whether or not these qualities are nurtured is a different matter. Worry will divert our focus from our strengths to our weaknesses. We will start viewing the world in a cynical manner, rather than the abode of goodness and virtue. We will lose faith on our own focus and goodness. We will lose our peace, imprisoning our minds and self-inflicting emotional torture. The mental state that worry brings, is our self-imposed penitentiary of fear and despair.
The outlook of the spiritual mind is always objective (detached) in its perceptions and thought processes. The spiritual mind is guided by natural justice, the higher energy, elevating itself beyond the everyday occurring trivia. Whilst a non-spiritual mindset will be biased (subjective) concerning itself with tit for tat, occupied by a mischievous, calculating devious nature. By conscious effort, we must re-train our mind and engage in the practice of detaching our minds from the subjective. In this way, we will be able to limit or erase the reactive emotions that are so deeply etched in our psyche. We are conditioned into a subjective mindset from an early age, as the majority of humans do not practice being objective.
Religion teaches us two simple rules to assist with the eradication of our worries and to become objective.
Humble yourself before the Lord.
Get comfortable with your relationship with the Lord, let Him worry about your problems.
However, we can only implement these rules if we can accept that we cannot control every aspect of our lives.
Only when an individual attains the knowledge of the self, will the sense of inadequacy disappear from within. S/he will become comfortable with the Lord, all of his/her conflicts and sorrows vanish, leading to natural, effortless happiness; s/ he becomes a spontaneous person as the burden of worry is taken away from life.
Objectively minded people recognise that worry is a subtle enemy, which can affect not only their faith in the Lord but other relationships. Those of a spiritual mindset will be comfortable in asking for divine intervention in their hour of need. They appreciate the limits of their capabilities, realising that in certain situations they can either;
1) invest their own efforts in an attempt to resolve their issues
2) alternatively by praying to the Almighty they pass their issues on and let the Lord take care of their issues.
In the latter option, the individual has instantaneously rid themself from any worry, anxiety and stress. Sometimes just to appreciate that God is aware of how scared you are, that all you need to do is just sit down, say nothing and share your feelings with a higher power.
The value of any item is objective. ‘Beauty is in the eye of the beholder’. Thus, place your fears, worry stress, dreams, expectations, family, and relationships in the hands of the Lord.
As humans we find it difficult to accept that things can and do go wrong in life. To a certain extent the impression within us, created by our cultural upbringing, that failure is not an option, that everything we do, must be successful. Whereas spiritual people will see that when things are not going to plan, this will be an ideal time to develop their relationship with the Lord, to let him into our lives. If you find inspiration in your darkest hour, you will be touched by the grace of the Lord and grow many fold. To help train our mind not to worry, it may be a good idea to prepare a money box. Every time we worry over 2 minutes, perhaps to put 10 pence into our moneybox. When the box is full to donate that money to a good cause. Therefore, converting our worries into a positive action, by helping others through our worries we will help ourselves.
We should remember that our worries are no more than our imagination which has lost direction. Maybe we should reminisce and pose this question; whether the things we were once worried about; how do they impact on our happiness today? Our ideology of happiness and unhappiness is relative, ever changing with our evolution. Nothing in life is constant. Worry is like, looking at the large shadow of small thorn. We concentrate on the shadow, rather than the miniscule thorn. A small issue with a large intimidating shadow. As a wheel rotates on an axis, in a similar way, our worries are like a wheel, which rotate on an axis of fear and uncertainty.
Whatever comes from the spiritual mind will be born from a still, silent mind that is accepting.
Our true creative existence free from worry, will be born from spontaneity, not from creating, steering and controlling our expectations. Whereas a spiritual mind understands, that exercising, a certain amount of responsibility is very important. However, there is ultimately a greater plan at work, over which we have no control, other than the control in the manner in which we conduct ourselves whilst we live and experience life. If we look at some of the greatest poets and artists of our time, the most valuable of pieces of art were born from the expression of feeling through spontaneity, rather than plans. They had very difficult lives but did not succumb to the nature of their worries.
Life is one big art. If we understand the spontaneous nature of life, we will reduce our worry many folds.
Our worries are dealt with by our ignorant ways, whether that be fear, anger, aggression, anger etc. However, we should realise that the situation that we find ourselves in sometimes is not the problem, rather the ignorant way in which we try to deal with our issues in our words our natural human way. We should be aspire to function in an innate elevated state that we all possess.
I did not ask for life to be over. But then again I did not ask for it to begin. For that is the way it is with life as some of the most beautiful days come completely by chance. However, even the most beautiful days eventually have their sunset.
Sri Guru Granth Sahib Jee
Subjective realisation may be good in certain situations but generates a huge amount garbage. When we live a life of subjective thoughts and behaviours, then, a time will come when we will have amassed a tremendous variety of emotion, both negative and positive through our own perceptions and understandings. Inevitably, given time, we will need to dispose of some of this garbage. This can result in releasing some of this garbage through irrational and irresponsible talk and or irresponsible behaviour. Naturally, this irresponsible talk will negatively impact upon our lives tremendously. The reverse of this is true; positive talk is immensely beneficial to our lives, assisting in the reduction of worry as we are conscious of our speech. For others, it may mean going into deep worry and high anxiety. Hence, thoughts arising from the mind are subjective by nature and thoughts arising from the stillness of the mind are objective by nature. The former will increase worry, whilst the latter will decrease worry. Many people will use the power of prayer and many will use the power of meditation to decrease their worries. But we should understand that unless we do not comprehend the subjective and objective nature of our mind, then, whatever prayer or meditation we do will be borne out of the amassed rubbish that we are hoarding within. When you are in love with someone for the first time, where are the worries? Nowhere to be seen, as there is no space between the two lovers, other than their own existence.
When a spiritual mind develops the same relationship with his Lord, there will be no space for worries as the spiritual mind will relax in the comfort and security of the Lord.
Remember that the spirit within us is peaceful and serene, the ego/our mind is fighting for control, whilst the conscience is observing and we are conscience! The spirit understands that what will be, will be, the ego is in revolt trying to control as the conscience makes the decision on what to accept, the spirit or the mind. The more we can trust that what will be, will happen, the more worry free we will become.
DON’T WORRY BE HAPPY
The Worry Tree!
An old man hired a Carpenter to help him restore an old farmhouse, which was the old man’s pride and joy. The carpenter had just finished his first day on the job not only did he have a flat tire that morning, which made him lose an hour of work, he also burnt the motor on his electric saw. Furthermore, his ancient pickup truck refused to start. The old man feeling sorry for the carpenter decided to give him a ride home, since the carpenter had a rough day. Whilst being driven home the carpenter sat in stony silence throughout the journey.
On arriving at his home, the carpenter invited the old man in to meet his family and to have a cup of tea for the inconvenience he had caused. As they walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree outside his house, touching the tips of the branches with both hands. On opening the door, he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned and worried face that carried all the weight of the world, wreathed in smiles as he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.
After the cup of tea the carpenter thanked the old man and he walked him to his car. The old man again passed the same tree, his curiosity got the better of him. He asked the carpenter about what he had seen him do earlier.
“Oh, that’s my trouble tree”, the carpenter replied, “I know I can’t help having troubles on the job, but one thing for sure, troubles don’t belong in the house with my wife and the children. Therefore, I just hang them on the tree every night when I come home. Then in the morning I pick them up again.”
“The Funny thing is”, he said with a smile, “when I come out in the morning to go and face another day at work the amount of worries I pick up, are a lot less than I remember hanging up the night before.”
United Humanity